I had to do it. I had to keep scrolling. I felt like I would never reach the bottom, but when I finally did, the feeling was nearly comparable to what Andy must have felt like when he victoriously emerged from the 4-mile long sewage pipes in Shawshank Redemption. An exaggeration? Okay, maybe a little bit, but it goes without saying that jail and Facebook do have at least a little something in common.
As I scanned all the faces and names, my inner dialogue went something like this:
Who is [let’s call her] Juicy LoveBuns?…I haven’t even talked to this pers–oh she has a baby! *Likes pictures*…Was I drunk or something when I added him?…Aw, well she liked my photo the other day. I can’t possibly delete her…Okay, ground rules for deleting “friends”: Rule #1) If I don’t care to see you in real life, then I the same goes for Facebook. Rule #2) If I haven’t talked to you at least once since I added you, adios! Rule # 3) If you haven’t replied to my wall posts…aw man, but he’s cute!
You get the idea.
There is so much offense generated by this topic. Irregardless, I had to eventually get the news flash. Understand that people still go on existing outside of Facebook; deleting someone does not delete him or her off the face of the living earth, contrary to popular belief.
Facebook does matter, though. Why some have 2000+ friends, why many will neglect to respond to messages, why others will log on to play countless hours of ludicrous games rather than actually socialize–it will always be a mystery to me. One thing that will not be a mystery, however, is the way that Facebook extracts and builds affections. A personalized, thoughtful message supersedes a mindless invite to play Sims Social any day in my opinion. It may be an overreaching concept to actually interact with people in modern society, but there is little to rivaled at the heart of it. We are relational beings in need of love whether we are face to face or facing a computer screen.
When I gazed upon my whittled down and much more accurately represented list of friends, I had an idea.
And now for Steven and Nick…